I'm SorryI'm sorry I couldn't be a good daughter
I'm sorry I couldn't be your good little girl
Or your princess, your angel, your cupcake
It's just not me. I'm not her.
I wish I could be.
I just want to make you proud.
All I want is for us all to be happy
But it doesn't seem possible now.
I wish so hard that I could be her
The one you love and know best
But instead I'm this dishonest alien to you
I'm the secret son that causes unrest.
I'm sorry. I really am.
I cannot express it enough.
But if I am to survive the world
I cannot pretend anymore
I can't be her.
Let me be XYMy chromosomes are wrong.
My breasts are wrong.
My hips are wrong.
My space is wrong.
I am in a shell, a prison.
Trapped, glued by 'miss', 'she', 'lady', my XX
A sticky, thick mixture of feminine.
I have never been me.
Few people know who I really am.
Him. He. His.
I am Tristan, and I'm a normal boy.
I just happen to be a biological SHE.
But no one sees me, no matter how hard I try,
I want to scream out for all to hear:
Just let me be XY
How to Know if You're TransI see these questions sometimes, about "how can you be sure you're trans?" I see the sentiment often in articles that claim to "question" transsexuality, from well-meaning but pain-in-the-ass bystanders, and so on. A lot of it gives me a migraine the size of a T-Rex behind my right eye, so I thought I might help clear up some of the confusion.
There is only one way to "know" you're trans. And that's because you feel you are. Does this answer seem vague to you? It should, because it is. As much as others would like to tell you otherwise, there is no "test" for being trans. There is no criteria that if you check enough boxes, congratulations, you're transgendered. I ID very strongly as trans, but I fail nearly every single criteria required for Aetna's insurance coverage of trans care. In Aetna's eyes, I'm not a "true transsexual,"
The Gated Trans CommunityI hate the concept of identity as gated community.
I've been seeing this in trans circles lately, this idea that you can't just have anybody identifying as trans, or the next thing you know, the bums will take over the whole neighborhood! You'll have those giggly yaoi fangirls who want to be bishounen because bishounen are hawt, and those creepy guys who want to be girls just so they can have sex with lesbians, and they will poison the community.
To which I wonder, poison with what? I'm serious here, how exactly will they harm the community?
If they're creepy, fetishistic people, well, that's certainly not a province solely for the cis. I've met creepy asshole trans people before, and I avoid them for being creepy assholes.
But that's not what you're really worried about. Because you're not talking about poisoning our community with creepiness and assholery. You're talking about our community being poisoned with